Monday, September 3, 2012

Summing it up and Have I learned from it?

All I have to say is Wow! This last year of my life has been about nothing but change! I have survived! At time I did not think I would. After all I am a creature of habit and change has been all around me all year long. Moving here 14 months ago so much is different. Why did I want to move here? Well we both did because it was closer to home and we could see family often and be involved again. I could see my grandmother more often. I could help get her out from in between my mom and her sister! Two days before I move here my beloved grandmother died. If I was coming here to take care of her what do I do now???? Move on......I guess....God's plan was different for me here...
  •  Let's see I could start first with the job situation. It has been a mishap of trail and error for me. I have a job it is too far away; then I get a job so much closer to home, I am so happy until I start to work there. It is not what has been sold to me. I was duped. I become a little depressed and angered. Open my mouth and insert foot; no I do not have a job. It is now summer again. Bills pile up and up and up. House in SC not showing can't pay two mortgages now.. I have to work. Told to file for unemployment by many so I do... File becomes lost, then needs special handling because I have worked in more than one state, then gets denied..Appeals applied for, still awaiting for those results..Office says should be next week we shall see!!We need some kind of money to pay bills so I except a travel assignment in Cleveland. It is 2 hours from home I will be staying there by myself on work days but gotta do what we gotta do. I move up there alone... start orientation. COme home for weekend and while assisting the dog she falls on my right wrist twists it in weird way. Now wrist is sprained. Calll to agency immediately. Hospital denies my contract! Unemployed again! Get an email from local college I have been in touch with off and on. They offer me a job! There is a catch I must complete my Master's degree by Oct of 2013. A call to my school, University of Phoenix, and it is possible I get job! First week teaching first year nursing students last week I LOVE IT!!!
  • We find a house here after looking for 9 month. Is it my dream home NO. Do I like it it is OK. We move in and immediately start to have water problems with the well, the softening system and all. Service call, another service call, another service call. Finally a new water system...well now odor returning in hot water tank...I will be calling them tomorrow! The basement smells musty! There was no musty smell in all inspections basement was good. Now mold, green growing on wall!Another issue we will have to pay for! Dad has a dehumidifier we can use down there. Just need to get it set up now!
  • Tia, the dog, is not doing well. She looks rough to me. I try to talk to DH about putting her down. He says NO he can not do it because she is better today. Then she is not she is ill again, then better, then ill, and on August 23 I find her dead in the yard! Will we get another dog? Don't know then DH starts talking about another dog. It is so quiet and lonely in this house now. Amazing how a dog that does not talk and sleeps a lot can give companionship. What kind of dog should we get? He wants a retriever he can hunt with. I want a small dog to cuddle with me and keep me company...So far we know he is getting what he wants as for me the cat is here, but she can not come in the house because she is litter box challenged; she just can't get it in a place with more than one room.
  • Sharon comes with kids and there is a light in ,my tunnel I have been descending into. Spending time with Sharon and kids. Wonderful! Spending more time with Ethan GREAT!! No money and unable to do things I would normally do with him, sad to me. But I do get to spend great time with them and go to Remy's birthday party when I take Ethan back to the west coast.
  • Bryan. I have not seen him and his family since we moved back. It is killing me but.... He starts a new job for in September maybe we can get together more now.... I miss him and I miss his family!
  • Church. We had a great church in SC. I loved my ladies group! Moving here was another transistion to a new church. We found a great church! I have been trying to get involved since we got here. The Ladies group has not worked out with my work schedule but should now! I would also lke to work with the kids. I started bt schedules for work have messed with it. Now with this job I should be able to...
Have I learned from this. One thing I have learned is God's timing is not my timing! The house in SC is still on the market but we are unable to make payments theree because of payments here so we may loose our shirts on that one unless DH company or someone steps in at the last minute and buys it up.
Trust! I have to trust God is leading me where he wants me to be otherwise I am just a small sailing ship in a storm with my sails stuck up going this way and that way. I try to trust Him every day.SOmedays all I can see if the storm clouds looming in but I do my best to trust him. Jesus loves me! I know this because my husband loves me even when I am cranky and miserable and just plain mean! He sticks by me. Jesus loves me more than DH although I can not undrstand why some days... I feel Jesus's love even in my darkest days even when I want to pull the covers over my head and go back to sleep until a brighter happier day comes along..He, God, has a plan for me. I do not know what it is yet but He does and I am trying to follow as best I can...and when I can't jesus carries me along the path to help keep me straight! 
I do not know it all nor do I know where this ship comes to an end but God does and He wants only the best for me!! So I will trust Him