Monday, September 14, 2009

God is good ALL THE TIME

I have been writing about turmoil going on with my grandmother, my mom, her sister and me. For those who do not know I will summarize. My grandmother and I whom we call Nana and I have always been close. (After my grandfather died and I had not seen him for a few months before he got sick I decided that would not happen with my grandmother. I was 19 when my Pap died.) SO I have made a point never to loose contact with my Nana. I have never gone loner than a week to either see her or talk to her. I am now 47 and I still try to honor this. Sometimes a week may linger into almost two but I always call her.
My mom moved in with my grandmother about 15 years ago to take care of her after a illness. She took care of my Nan until about two years ago when my mom got sick after my son's wedding and ended up moving in with me. My grandmother wanted to be where my mom was so she and my mom moved from Pennsylvania to SC to live with me. They did so for just short of 2 years when they moved into their own place here. Then my grandmother had to have surgery on a hiatal hernia; after that she became total care. Her body was failing but her mind was still there. She could not walk and fell once or twice at their home. My mom's doctor told my mom she could no longer take care of my gram by her self. Since I have to work we talked to my gram and decided she would go to a nursing home. We got her in a place here that was beautiful! It was like a dream. They had a porch she could go out to sit on, an ice cream shop where she could get FREE ice cream for her and her visitors and many other amenities. My aunt, my mother's sister, wanted my grandmother closer to FAMILY she said so she complained enough and used a illness she has as bait for not being able to travel to get my gram back up in Pa in a nursing home facility. So my mother feeling sorry for her sister because of the health problems we thought was causing her not be able to come here to visit my grandmother mom conceded and moved my gram to PA to a state run nursing home. Yes it is exactly what it sounds like, that is all I have to say about that. Since the move back to PA my aunt in the course of moving my gram in had her sign a power of attorney, unknowingly.
That is when the tirade began. My mom and sister went to take my gram out to dinner after which my mom got a call the aunt, her sister, telling her she could only take my gram out with HER PERMISSION. I went to visit with my grandson and son and was told I was NOT ALLOWED to take my grandmother off the unit to SIT ON THE PORCH. Last week I got a call from the aunt she told me she wanted something I had that my gram had given me when she was here with me. (I did not ask for this is was GIVEN to me). She told me if I did not give it to her I would be FORBIDDEN to see my gram. I was crushed and of course agreed to anything so I could see my Nana. After talking about it to my daughter who is in law enforcement. She told me this was harassment and I should go to my local police dept and ask about phone harassment charges. I did. They stated they could not prosecute because this aunt lives in another state but they cold call her and tell her not to call me again and if she wanted anything from me in the future she should do it a legal action. That was Friday. (Mind you I am praying about this since the triad started as is my immediate family). The police called the aunt left a message for her to call back. Saturday the aunt called my mom several times mom did not answer. Yesterday the aunt left a message on my mom's voice mail that she was going on vacation and now we had to deal with her son; when I got there this week I was to call her son from the parking lot of my Nana's nursing home he would come to get the object she wanted and then He would ALLOW us to visit my Nana. This was both my mom and me. She was FORBIDDING us from seeing my grandmother until she got what she wanted! I was outraged! My mind started racing. I would go to court get visitation, she could not keep from my Nana who WANTED to see me. As I sat and pondered my actions in my mind a thought popped in my head (which I now know was from the Lord!) to do some Internet searching on elder abuse. I found out what she is doing is isolation which is abuse. I also found a site for the state of PA for elder abuse. I called my mom and started telling her what I had found. While I was reading the site to her I found a phone number which answered 24/7. Mom called. They agreed is elder abuse and THEY WILL TAKE CARE OF IT!!! PRAISE THE LORD!!! THEY SAID SHE CAN NOT KEEP US FROM SEEING MY GRAM AS LONG AS SHE WANTED TO SEE US!!!!
SO we are continuing to pray this job until completion. I am going to PA this week to see my gram Hopefully I can get in, I know I will with the Lords help!!!


Donna's Book Nook said...

I'm so sorry for the problems you've had over this. I'm glad that it is apparently going to be resolved. Your sweet gram deserves to be able to see family members that she wants to see. Blessings. Donna

Washer Mom Val said...

Wow. You go girl.